jonesies

Well I hadn't planned on blogging for awhile because I just blogged not very long ago.  I am not one of those people that keeps up with this thing very well. Lord knows I have a lot to say I just choose to do it more in person, texting, facebooking, and on my phone. :)

But I have some things on my heart so this is my grown up version of dear diary and I am going to think it out loud here.

ahhhh...let's take this thing back to my newly wed days, okay acutally lets go a little before that.  I was brought up to believe and live like if you didn't NEED it...you didn't buy it. I was laughed at when I asked for a pair of doc martins and also when I asked if I could go to Kanakuk.  I knew we weren't in debt and I knew they could have afforded those things, but it wasn't until I got older that I realized they weren't in debt because they didn't splurge all the time. Don't get me wrong I always had everything I needed and more, but I got told no more than I got told yes.

I loved my grandparents instilling that in me.  I loved that they cared enough about me to tell me no.
I lived this way for most of our (almost 13 year) marriage. I can remember Ben and I talking about that magic number.  If he just made $this much, we would be so wonderful.  Listen, we couldn't even stop and buy a pop for $1 certain times in our marriage, so my goals were really not that high.  Well fast forward and he finally got to that dream number.  Okay, we said, we will never ever live beyond this. Ever. We will live like we do now and retire happily one day.  Insert reality and lack of self discipline here. Then throw in a couple extra kids, car problems, health bills, and you have your self a dead dream.

Now don't get me wrong I have picked up plenty of odd jobs here and there to cushion any financial strains we have felt as a family, but the one thing that has slowly drifted is that small yet very reasonable voice I used to have of "deny yourself."

I have never had designer sunglasses, purses, or even a diamond ring to wear, BUT I do drive a nice vehicle, buy my kids way too much junk, run into the store and throw stuff in the cart without noticing how much it is all adding up to, drive around too much, I don't say no to invitations to go out to eat even though we already have indulged too much.... you get the picture I am sure.

And let me say that Ben has done a wonderful job taking care of the kids and I.  I am so proud of his work through college, his entry level position he had right out of college, and his promotions.  And that is the thing, with his salary we should be seriously achieving some goals here. We do the basics (retirement, small saving), but I am challenged and ready to go beyond that.

I am amazed and saddened at how far I have drifted from who I was brought up to be.  I know what the saying "keeping up with the jones" means, I never really thought of myself as someone who did that.  But I am realizing it isn't just about the big fancy homes, cars, trips, etc.  I have bought into the lie that I NEED a smart phone (yes I said it, I know half of you are chalking me up as lost her marbles crazy, and I understand that in 2012 it is shocking to realize Dana doesn't NEED a smartphone), my kids NEED to keep up with the trends, my kids NEED to have electronics, we NEED to take big family vacations, I NEED to run to the store to make some new recipe I just saw today on Pinterest instead of something more practical and that I already have here at home, the list goes on....(to my everlasting shame)

So I don't know where this takes me or how many changes I can make. I want lasting change.  But I read an amazing blog today that inspired me to take another look at my goals, my habits, and my spending.

I have decided that the Jones' are probably tired and broke, and I don't want to live like that anyways.


Here is the link to the blog I read for those interested...http://silvykehrli.blogspot.com/2012/08/preparing-to-stay-at-home-finances.html

Back To The Future

I love Pandora.  I grew up on country music and The Temptations, and the hillbilly in me is so in awe of how Pandora puts a special station on just for me, :) I also love summer time.  So you put those two things together and for a split second I am living in a movie scene with my windows rolled down while heading down the road like I don't have a care in the world. (or a kenney chesney video)

It is such a nostalgic feeling I suppose.  Even though my childhood wasn't ideal, it was filled with lots of wonderful memories. (thanks to my awesome wonderful grandparents!)  Probably most of them the same as yours.

There was a lot of swimming, back truck riding, mud pie making, Garth Brooks listening, popcorn eating, lightning bug chasing days that helped make up my child hood.  High school was equally as fun. Once I got my truck keys I was out having the time of my life doing a whole lotta nothing.

I really did enjoy my childhood.  (thanks again to my grandparents) but of course I find myself now saying "I wish I knew then what I know now"

So amuse me and let me just get it out of my system now...

Dear Teenage Self,

1.  When you are 15 and hear a song strawberry wine and think the girl is crazy when she sings "I still remember when 30 was old" because you still think 30 is old, listen to it again when YOU are 30 and you will finally get that lyric

2. When you are panicked about what other people think about you, just remember they are all panicked too, wondering what you think about them

3. Your zits will go away. But have no fear plenty of other weird things will happen to your body. Even knees get wrinkly.  and IT'S OKAY.

4. MC Hammer pants aren't cool for very long, but that picture your mom takes of you wearing them will last forever

5.Don't let your anger or hurt feelings get in the way of building up others.  Your mouth is a small part of your entire body, but can cause you more trouble than you ever need to have.

6. When you mess up, accept God's forgiveness, claim it and move on.  You are flesh and all those people you think have it all together suffer from the same misfortune of fleshing out too.

7. Don't buy into all the songs and movies you watch now. True love is deeper than any romanticized scene in Titanic.

8. Don't watch Titanic with Ben. :)

9. Say thank you to your grandparents everyday for the affection and blessings they pour on you everyday. And if you disrespect them go to them immediatley and apologize.

10. Believe older people when they say you have the life of riley and don't even know it.

11. Ask what the life of Riley means instead of rolling your eyes, then at least you will know what they are talking about

12. Pray. Thank the Lord for everything good in your life and pray about your future and thank Him in advance for all the wonderful things He has in store for you.

Ahhh..Wouldn't that have been nice.  But you know what, I would have done some eye rolling and probably tossed that letter in a heart beat.

I am so thankful that I can look back now and see I have come a long way.  That, I guess is the order of events. I know my 60 year old self will one day look back on me now and want to share some major advice. But I am grateful that the Lord gives me a promise.   Proverbs 2:10-11 says For wisdom will enter your heart, and knowledge will be pleasant to your soul. Discretion will protect you, and understanding will guard you.  


I know it is already working, because I didn't take Ben to see Titanic in 3D when it came back out recently  :)